Saturday, June 2, 2018

Update From NMS H.I.C.K.S.

At the NMS Headquarters of Information Central Karma Silo (HICKS), we have received unconfirmed reports that THIS MAN #1...


has been spotted entering another Lemons race. This photo was taken last fall at the Camden South Carolina gathering prior to the Lemons race. Further investigation has confirmed that the Coronautski II racing team has some mysterious ties to the Russian government, but other than spotting some vodka bottles and funny Russian hats, our sources wouldn't state on or off the record if this is in any way related to the ongoing investigation of the 2016 Presidential investigation. 

As we were preparing this report for the national media, an anonymous source that goes by the name of "Boris" also told us that he suspects THIS MAN #2...


was also spotted at the Lemons race in South Carolina last year. While this mystery man, AKA "the man in the white hat" has questionable driving skills, some say he may also be connected with the Team Coronautski Russian connection. While it may be too much to believe, the odds of both these suspects driving in a Lemons race in the future is not beyond the realm of possibility. 

NMS will keep you updated if any of these suspicious persons is found to be connected with the Russia investigation, enters any Lemons races, or are spotted in the Camden SC area. 
After a detailed analysis using infrared brake fluid and cartographic cereal imaging, our NMS HICKS team has further identified what appears to be a Picnic Table Car in the photo. Believed to be part of the Tesla-Ferrari joint venture being built in Elbonia, it remains unclear how the Picnic Table Car, Russian racers, and the Lemons race event are related as well. Further study and a few gazillion dollars in grant money should be enough to help the NMS HICKS team make up some more ridiculous theories of what this all means. 


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